Hidden Brain

Reframing the Battle of Wills

<p>It can be frustrating when people do things we don't want them to do. A friend cancels plans at the last minute. A child refuses to get dressed for school. Before long, our resentment builds, and we're tempted to issue more rules, reminders, and consequences. But the techniques we use to get people to alter their behavior are often strikingly ineffective. This week, psychologist <a href="https://researchers.mgh.harvard.edu/profile/3132546/J.-Stuart-Ablon">Stuart Ablon</a> explains why these methods fail, and offers better ways to help the people we care about make lasting change..</p><p><i>If you love Hidden Brain, join us for an upcoming live show! We'll be in Los Angeles on November 22, and more dates in 2026 are coming soon. For tickets and more info, go to </i><a href="https://www.hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.tour</i></a><i>.</i><br /> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Love 2.0: How to Move On

<p>For many of us, navigating the conclusion of a relationship is one of the hardest things we'll ever do. This week, we conclude our Love 2.0 series with psychologist <a href="https://www.uwindsor.ca/people/apl/314/bio-contact">Antonio Pascual-Leone</a>, who shares the most common mistakes we make when it comes to splitting up, and techniques that can help us ease the pain. Then, our latest edition of Your Questions Answered. Cognitive scientist <a href="https://www.colorado.edu/business/leeds-directory/faculty/philip-fernbach">Phil Fernbach</a> returns to respond to listeners' thoughts and questions about the "illusion of knowledge." </p><p><i>Do you have questions for Antonio Pascual-Leone about breakups? Are there losses that have left you feeling stuck? Have you discovered techniques to move on when a relationship ends? If you'd be willing to share your question or comment with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Two or three minutes is plenty. Use the subject line "breakups." Thanks!</i></p><p><a href="https://unsplash.com/@yanakravchuk/illustrations"><i>Image by Yana Kravchuk for Unsplash+</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Love 2.0: Reimagining Our Relationships

<p>No one will deny that marriage is hard. In fact, there’s evidence it’s getting even harder. This week on the show, we revisit a favorite episode about the history of marriage and how it has evolved over time. We talk with historian Stephanie Coontz and psychologist <a href="https://www.kellogg.northwestern.edu/faculty/directory/finkel_eli/">Eli Finkel</a>, and explore ways we can improve our love lives — including by asking less of our partners. Then, on Your Questions Answered, psychologist <a href="https://www.olin.edu/bios/jonathan-m-adler">Jonathan Adler</a> answers your questions about the science of storytelling.</p><p><i>If you have follow-up questions or thoughts about these ideas, and you’d be willing to share them with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone. Then, email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “marriage.” That email address again is </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>.</i></p><p><i>The Hidden Brain tour is continuing, with our next stop just a few weeks away! Join us in Los Angeles on November 22, and stay tuned for more dates coming in 2026. For more info and tickets, head to </i><a href="https://www.hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>. </i></p><p><i>Episode illustration by Getty Images for Unsplash+</i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Love 2.0: How to Fix Your Marriage, Part 2

<p>When things go wrong in our relationships, we often try to change the way our partners behave. But usually, trying to fix a person only makes things worse. Last week, we talked to psychologist <a href="https://www.clarku.edu/faculty/profiles/james-cordova/">James Cordova</a> about why this tendency can be so damaging, and what to do instead. This week, we explore another difficult but effective way to strengthen our relationships. Then, on Your Questions Answered, we bring back researcher <a href="https://sph.umich.edu/faculty-profiles/strecher-victor.html">Victor Strecher</a>, who studies purpose. Vic spoke with us in June about the death of his daughter, and how it changed his own outlook on purpose. That conversation, which was called "<a href="https://www.hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-what-is-your-life-for/">You 2.0: What Is Your Life For?</a>" had a powerful impact on many listeners. We'll hear Vic's responses to their thoughts and questions. </p><p><i>What have you learned about changing your partner in the course of your relationship? Have you come up with ways to accept your partner's flaws? If you have questions or comments for James Cordova, and you'd be willing to share with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a short voice memo on your phone and email it to us at ideas@hiddenbrain.org. Use the subject line "acceptance." Thanks! </i></p><p><i>The Hidden Brain tour is continuing, with our next stops just a few days away! Join us in Baltimore on October 11 or Washington, D.C. on October 12 to see Shankar live on stage. We'll also be in Los Angeles on November 22, and more dates in 2026 are coming soon. For more info and tickets, head to </i><a href="https://www.hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>. </i></p><p><i>Episode illustration by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@parisbilal/illustrations"><i>Paris Bilal</i></a><i> for Unsplash+. </i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Love 2.0: How to Fix Your Marriage, Part 1

<p>Many love stories end when the characters are still in the heady, euphoric early stages of a relationship. But what comes <i>after </i>that intoxicating first phase of love is over? Today, we kick off a new series on the challenges specific to long-term relationships. We'll talk with psychologist <a href="https://www.clarku.edu/faculty/profiles/james-cordova/">James Cordova</a> about some of the common difficulties many couples face. We'll also look at a solution that scientific research suggests might actually work. Then, we'll bring you the latest installment of our segment Your Questions Answered. Researcher <a href="https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Pages/profile.aspx?facId=1175257">Jon Jachimowicz</a> returns to respond to listeners' thoughts about the pursuit of passions. </p><p><i>If you’d like to see Hidden Brain live and hear some of Shankar's key takeaways from the first decade of the show, we have stops coming up on our tour! We’ll be in Baltimore on October 11th, Washington, D.C. on October 12th, and Los Angeles on November 22nd. Plus, we’ll have more stops for 2026 to announce soon. For more info and tickets, go to hiddenbrain.org/tour.</i></p><p><i>And if you enjoyed today's episode with James Cordova, check out our Hidden Brain+ conversation with him about relationship check-ups. James explains why an annual relationship assessment can help couples to spot issues before they become major problems. Plus, he shares some of the questions he asks couples during these sessions. If you're not yet a Hidden Brain+ subscriber, Apple Podcasts is offering an extended 30-day free trial for all listeners who give it a try in the month of September. To claim your free trial, find Hidden Brain in the Apple Podcasts app and click the "Try Free" button, or go to </i><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hidden-brain/id1028908750"><i>apple.co/hiddenbrain</i></a><i>. </i></p><p><i>This week's episode art is by Chloe for Unsplash+</i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Passion vs. Paycheck

<p>The idea of being driven by a calling goes back centuries. It was the language used to describe religious people who were called to the priesthood. Today, millions of people in secular professions yearn to be similarly galvanized by their work. This week, researcher <a href="https://www.babson.edu/about/our-leaders-and-scholars/faculty-and-academic-divisions/faculty-profiles/jennifer-tosti-kharas.php" target="_blank">Jennifer Tosti-Kharas</a> explores the immense power — and the downsides — of finding a job that gives you purpose.</p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions or stories that you’d like to share with Jennifer Tosti-Kharas? Have you found a calling that gets you up in the morning each day? Are you a skeptic of callings, or do you have questions about how to make your work more meaningful? If you’d be willing to share your questions, stories and comments with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “calling.”</i></p><p><i>If you love Hidden Brain, please consider joining our podcast subscription, Hidden Brain+. All through the month of September, listeners who subscribe to Hidden Brain+ on Apple Podcasts will have access to an extended 30-day free trial. To access that trial, find Hidden Brain on Apple Podcasts and click the “Try Free” button. Or go to </i><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hidden-brain/id1028908750"><i>apple.co/hiddenbrain</i></a><i>. </i></p><p><i>And there are still tickets available for our upcoming live shows! We'll be in Baltimore on October 11, Washington, D.C. on October 12, and Los Angeles on November 22. More info and tickets are at </i><a href="https://www.hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>.</i></p><p><i>Episode illustration by Evelina Mitev for Unsplash+</i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

It&apos;s Not My Fault!

<p>It's not easy for most of us to receive negative feedback. Even when the person delivering that feedback is constructive and reasonable, we often feel the urge to defend ourselves. This week, we look at the psychology of defensiveness with neuroscientist <a href="https://www.asc.upenn.edu/people/faculty/emily-falk-phd">Emily Falk.</a> We'll explore what causes so many of us to resist constructive criticism, and how we can get better at giving and receiving such feedback. Then, in the latest installment of our ongoing series "Your Questions Answered," psychologist <a href="https://people.ucd.ie/ciara.greene">Ciara Greene</a> returns to the show to answer your questions about memory and forgetfulness.</p><p><i>If you have follow-up questions or thoughts for Emily Falk after listening to today’s conversation, and you’d be willing to share with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “mental barriers.” Thanks! </i></p><p><i>Our next stops on the Hidden Brain tour are coming up! Join us in Baltimore on October 11, Washington, D.C. on October 12, or Los Angeles on November 22. And stay tuned for more cities to be added for 2026. For more info and tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour. </i></a></p><p><i>Episode illustration by Getty Images for Unsplash+</i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Winning the Battle Against Yourself

<p>Many of us have been raised to believe that if we want to get something done, we just need to set our minds to it. Where there's a will, there's a way, right? Yet somehow we end up polishing off that pint of ice cream in the freezer, or spending more than our budget allows. It's almost as if we're not the ones in charge. This week, we talk with psychologist and neuroscientist <a href="https://www.asc.upenn.edu/people/faculty/emily-falk-phd">Emily Falk</a> about why our minds often conspire against our best interests, and how we can regain control. </p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions or thoughts for Emily Falk after listening to today’s conversation? If you’d be willing to share with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “mental barriers.” Thanks!</i></p><p><i>And if you love Hidden Brain, please consider joining our podcast subscription, Hidden Brain+. We're currently offering an extended 30-day free trial for all listeners who subscribe on Apple Podcasts during the month of September. To sign up, click the "Subscribe" or "Try Free" button in Apple Podcasts, or go to</i><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hidden-brain/id1028908750"><i> apple.co/hiddenbrain</i></a><i>. Your subscription helps to fund the research, writing, and sound design that go into every episode of the show. We appreciate your support! </i></p><p><i>Episode illustration by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@fadhilsanad?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Fast Ink</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/illustrations/a-boy-is-confronted-by-a-fearful-shadow-BF9aajWB9dc?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Escaping Perfectionism

<p>Perfectionism is everyone’s favorite flaw. It’s easy to assume that our push to be perfect is what leads to academic, athletic, and professional success. But how do we distinguish between high standards and unrealistic expectations? This week, we bring you a favorite conversation with psychologist <a href="https://www.lse.ac.uk/pbs/people/Dr-Thomas-Curran">Thomas Curran</a>. He says perfectionism has a dark side, and that there are much healthier ways to strive for excellence. Then, we bring you the latest edition of our segment "Your Questions Answered." Sociologist <a href="https://www.allisonpugh.com/">Allison Pugh</a> returns to the show to respond to listener questions about connective labor — the work of seeing another person, and having that person feel seen.</p><p><i>The Hidden Brain tour continues this fall! Join us in Baltimore on October 11, Washington, D.C. on October 12, or Los Angeles on November 22. More info and tickets at </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour.</i></a></p><p><a href="https://unsplash.com/illustrations/exhausted-worker-is-out-of-energy-and-needs-a-recharge-cdxX6xVB7Z0"><i>Episode image</i></a><i> by Dadi Prayoga for Unsplash.com. </i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

The Trauma Script

<p>When tragedy strikes, it’s natural to be devastated. But psychologist <a href="https://www.tc.columbia.edu/faculty/gab38/">George Bonanno</a> finds that many of us recover from life’s blows more quickly than we might expect. This week, we talk with Bonanno about his research and why it has changed how many scientists think about trauma and resilience.</p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions or comments after listening to this episode? If you’d be willing to share your thoughts with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “trauma.” Thanks! </i></p><p><i>Episode illustration by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@ahmed_hossam_eldin?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Ahmed Hossam</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/illustrations/a-person-sits-alone-appearing-sad-and-isolated-B1x3KYNgae0?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

How Our Brains Learn

<p>Have you ever fallen asleep in school or during a work meeting? Maybe you felt your eyes glaze over as your boss or a teacher droned on and on about a topic that had no relevance to you. What's missing from these classrooms and conference rooms is engagement: A state of being absorbed, alert, and eager to learn. This week, psychologist and neuroscientist <a href="https://rossier.usc.edu/faculty-research/directory/maryhelen-immordinoyang" target="_blank">Mary Helen Immordino-Yang</a> explores why so many of us feel apathetic at school and at work, and how to cultivate the magic of engagement.</p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions or comments after listening to this episode? If you’d be willing to share your thoughts with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “learning.” Thanks! </i></p><p><i>Episode photo by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@hajjidirir?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Ismail Salad Osman Hajji dirir</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/boy-in-blue-and-white-plaid-shirt-reading-book-v7FT5ngIEfA?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

The Best Years of Your Life

<p>Aging isn’t just a biological process. Our outlooks and emotions also change as we age, often in ways that boost our well-being. This week, we revisit a favorite conversation with psychologist <a href="https://profiles.stanford.edu/laura-carstensen">Laura Carstensen</a>, who helps us unpack the science behind this surprising finding, and shares what all of us can learn from older people. Then, as part of our ongoing series "Your Questions Answered," we revisit our follow-up chat with Laura, who responds to listeners' thoughts and questions and shares more of her research on what it means to live well as we age.</p><p><i>Come see Shankar in person and help us to celebrate Hidden Brain's tenth anniversary! Our next stops on our "Perceptions" tour are Mesa, Baltimore, Washington, D.C., and Los Angeles. For more info and tickets, visit </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</i></a></p><p><i>Episode photo by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@capture_it?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Hector Reyes</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/couple-kissing-on-the-road-during-daytime-GrSfB6-OPoY?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Radical Kindness

<p>Why do some people risk their own lives to help another person, or give away their fortunes for the benefit of strangers? This week, we talk with psychologist and neuroscientist <a href="https://gufaculty360.georgetown.edu/s/contact/00336000014RYGZAA4/abigail-a-marsh">Abigail Marsh</a>, who studies the science of altruism. We'll explore what's known about the brains of people who perform acts of remarkable selflessness, and how the rest of us can learn to be more like them. </p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions, comments, or stories about altruism and generosity after listening to this episode? If you'd be comfortable sharing with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “generosity.” And if you liked today's conversation, please check out our sister podcast, "My Unsung Hero." You can find the show on this podcast platform, or by visiting our website: </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/myunsunghero/"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/myunsunghero/</i></a></p><p><i>The Hidden Brain tour heads to Toronto on Wednesday, August 6! Join Shankar there or at one of our upcoming stops in Baltimore, Washington, D.C., or Los Angeles. More info and tickets here: </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/ </i></a></p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

You 2.0: Change Your Story, Change Your Life

<p>We all tell stories about ourselves, often without realizing we’re doing so. How we frame those stories can profoundly shape our lives. In our latest You 2.0 episode, we bring you a favorite conversation with psychologist <a href="https://www.olin.edu/bios/jonathan-m-adler">Jonathan Adler</a>. He shares how to tell our stories in ways that enhance our wellbeing. Then, <a href="https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Pages/profile.aspx?facId=6420">Max Bazerman</a> answers your questions about the science of negotiation.</p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions or ideas that you’d like to share after listening to our conversation with Jonathan Adler? How do you tell the story of your life, and  how does that shape the way you see yourself? If you’re comfortable sharing your thoughts and questions with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “personal stories.” </i></p><p><i>Hidden Brain's "Perceptions" tour is continuing this fall! Join Shankar at an upcoming stop; more info and tickets here: </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</i></a></p><p><i>Episode Illustration by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@artattackzone?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Art Attack</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/illustrations/a-cup-of-coffee-and-a-book-on-a-table-RpSTMkZGKyE?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

You 2.0: The Wisdom of Stoicism

<p>What does it mean to be stoic? Many of us assume it means you have a stiff upper lip, or that you suppress your emotions. That's what <a href="https://www.ccny.cuny.edu/profiles/massimo-pigliucci?srsltid=AfmBOorNJDs13K9OMCn-z242DqG_naaPrj7qgcXC9EiZn7ZwHJGa-1eg">Massimo Pigliucci</a> thought — until he started to peruse a book called<i> Meditations</i>. It was written nearly two thousand years ago by the Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius. But Massimo, now a philosopher, says <i>Meditations</i>, and Stoic philosophy more broadly, offer wisdom that continues to speak to our lives. This week, we explore Stoic ideas and what they tell us about a life well lived. </p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions and ideas about stoicism after listening to this episode? If you’d be comfortable sharing your comments and questions with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at </i><a href="mailto:ideas@hiddenbrain.org" target="_blank"><i>ideas@hiddenbrain.org</i></a><i>. Use the subject line “stoicism.”  </i></p><p><i>Photo by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@heyquilia?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Kenny Eliason</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/green-ceramic-statue-of-a-man-2RRq1BHPq4E?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

You 2.0: The Path to Contentment + Your Questions Answered on Conversations

<p>Many of us believe that hard work and persistence are the key to achieving our goals. But is that true when it comes to the pursuit of happiness? This week, we revisit a conversation with psychologist <a href="https://psychology.berkeley.edu/people/iris-mauss">Iris Mauss</a>, who explains why happiness can seem more elusive the harder we chase it, and what we can do instead to build a lasting sense of contentment. Then, we bring you the latest edition of our segment "Your Questions Answered." Behavioral scientist <a href="https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Pages/profile.aspx?facId=684820">Alison Wood Brooks</a> answers listener questions on how to be a better conversationalist — from what to do when the other person isn't contributing, to how to stop others from interrupting.</p><p><i>Miss our original episodes with Alison Wood Brooks? They're called "</i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/we-need-to-talk/"><i>We Need to Talk</i></a><i>" and "</i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/the-conversations-that-bring-us-closer/"><i>The Conversations that Bring Us Closer</i></a><i>." </i></p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions, thoughts, or ideas about the pursuit of happiness after listening to our conversation with Iris Mauss? If you'd be comfortable sharing your thoughts with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at ideas@hiddenbrain.org. Use the subject line "happiness." Thanks! </i></p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

You 2.0: The Passion Pill

<p>You’ve probably heard the saying, “Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.” The idea is that pursuing your passion will feel invigorating — almost magical. But passions can easily wane over time. This week, behavioral scientist <a href="https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Pages/profile.aspx?facId=1175257">Jon Jachimowicz</a> looks at how to keep our passions alive, and how to channel old passions into new pursuits.</p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions for Jon Jachimowicz, or ideas that you'd like to share after listening to this episode? If you'd be willing to share them with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at ideas@hiddenbrain.org. Use the subject line "passion."</i></p><p><i>And a reminder that our live tour is underway! Shankar is traveling across the U.S. and Canada to share some of the key ideas he's learned in the first decade of the show. To see if we're coming to a city near you, please visit </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>.  </i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

You 2.0: What Is Your Life For?

<p>What should you do with your life? There's no one-size-fits-all answer to that question. But there <i>are</i> scientifically-tested methods that can help you to feel more in harmony with yourself and the world. This week, and in a companion conversation for Hidden Brain+, researcher <a href="https://sph.umich.edu/faculty-profiles/strecher-victor.html">Victor Strecher</a> explores the science of creating a life full of meaning. It's the kickoff to our annual You 2.0 series, which this year will focus on purpose and passion. If you’ve reached the midpoint of the year and you’re feeling adrift, alone, or burned out, this series is for you.  </p><p><i>Do you have follow-up questions for Victor Strecher, or ideas that you'd like to share after listening to this episode? If you'd be willing to share them with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone and email it to us at ideas@hiddenbrain.org. Use the subject line "purpose."</i></p><p><i>And a reminder that our live tour is underway! Shankar is traveling across the U.S. and Canada to share some of the key ideas he's learned in the first decade of the show. To see if we're coming to a city near you, please visit </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>.  </i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Win Hearts, Then Minds + Your Questions Answered on Identity and &quot;Covering&quot;

<p>There’s a saying that’s attributed to the Dalai Lama: in the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher. It’s a nice idea. But when people don’t share our values, it’s hard for us to tolerate theirs. This week, we bring you a favorite episode with sociologist <a href="https://sociology.stanford.edu/people/robb-willer" target="_blank">Robb Willer.</a> We discuss the common mistakes we make in trying to persuade others of our point of view — and how to break out of our echo chambers. Then, Kenji Yoshino answers your questions about how we hide our true selves.</p><p>In this week’s show, you’ll learn:</p><p>*What’s happening in our minds when we’re trying to win an argument.</p><p>*Techniques for how to take another person’s perspective — and how to become more effective in persuading them of <i>your </i>perspective.</p><p>*The most successful protest tactics in winning allies.</p><p>*Why we might shift from trying to change someone’s mind to trying to change their <i>behavior.</i></p><p><i>If you love Hidden Brain, come see Shankar live in a city near you this summer! For more info and tickets to our “Perceptions” tour, visit </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/" target="_blank"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Doing it the Hard Way

<p>Learning to play a musical instrument is hard. So is trying to run a marathon, writing a term paper, and caring for a sick child. These things involve frustration, pain, and disappointment — yet we do them anyway. This week, in part two of our look at the allure of suffering, psychologist <a href="https://michaelinzlicht.com/#lab-view">Michael Inzlicht</a> explains what we get from doing things that are difficult, and why the things we <i>think</i> will make us happy often do not.</p><p><i>Hidden Brain is hitting the road this summer! Join Shankar in a city near you as he shares key insights from the first decade of the show. For more info, and to purchase tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>. </i></p><p><i>Episode photo by </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/@itsomidarmin?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>omid armin</i></a><i> on </i><a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/woman-in-gray-sports-bra-and-black-shorts-climbing-on-brown-rock-mountain-during-daytime-f7MjbzHOxNU?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash"><i>Unsplash</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Ouch! That Feels Great

<p>We generally think of pain as something to be avoided. But psychologist <a href="https://www.psych.utoronto.ca/people/directories/all-faculty/paul-bloom">Paul Bloom</a> says that as much as we're wired to avoid suffering, we also seek it out. This week, we begin a two-part mini series about the curious pleasure we take in certain forms of pain.</p><p><i>Hidden Brain is about to go on tour! Join Shankar in a city near you as he shares key insights from the first decade of the show. For more info and tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/.</i></a><br /> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

The Price of Revenge

<p>Revenge often feels sweet, but what price do we pay for seeking it out? Researcher <a href="https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/james-kimmel/">James Kimmel, Jr.</a> proposes a radical theory: our desire for vengeance operates like an addiction in the brain. This week, how “revenge addiction” plays out in our everyday lives — and on a global scale. </p><p><i>Hidden Brain is about to go on tour! Join us as Shankar shares seven key insights he's learned from the show over the past decade. To see if we're coming to your city, and to purchase tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></a><i>. </i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Do I Know You? (A Hidden Brain-Revisionist History special on facial recognition)

<p>Have you ever encountered someone who clearly knows you, but you have no idea who they are? This week, we feature a classic Hidden Brain episode about people on opposite ends of the facial recognition spectrum. Then, in the second part of the show, we bring you another perspective on facial recognition from the <a href="https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/revisionist-history">Revisionist History</a> podcast. Host Malcolm Gladwell struggles with identifying faces, while producer Lucie Sullivan is exceptional at it.</p><p><i>Hidden Brain is about to kickoff a nationwide tour! Join Shankar as he shares seven key insights from the first decade of the show. To find out if we're coming to a city near you, and purchase tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/">https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

How Much Do We Really Know?

<p>You probably know someone who thinks they know more about something than they really do. But you could never be described that way . . . could you? This week, cognitive scientist <a href="https://www.colorado.edu/business/leeds-directory/faculty/philip-fernbach">Phil Fernbach</a> explains the "illusion of knowledge" — the fact that we <i>think</i> we understand the world in much greater detail than we actually do. He'll explore why this happens, and how to close the gap between what we know and what we <i>think</i> we know. </p><p><i>Hidden Brain is about to go on tour! Join Shankar in a city near you as he shares key insights from the first decade of the show. For more info and tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/"><i>https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Forget About It!

<p>Forgetting something — whether it's a colleague's name or where we put our keys — can be deeply frustrating. This week, psychologist <a href="https://ucdattentionmemory.com/people/" target="_blank">Ciara Greene</a> helps us explore the science of forgetting. We look at why our minds hold on to some memories for a lifetime, but discard others within seconds. And we grapple with a question many people ask themselves: Is my forgetfulness a sign that something is wrong with me?</p><p><strong>In this episode</strong>,<strong> you'll learn about: </strong></p><p>*The neurological underpinnings of memory</p><p>*Why forgetting is a core part of how our minds work </p><p>*Why this process of forgetting can sometimes be a good thing</p><p>*How our psychological states shape what we remember, and how we frame our memories</p><p>*Why we should treat our memories with skepticism and our forgetfulness with compassion </p><p><i>Hidden Brain is going on tour! Join us as Shankar shares key insights from the first decade of the show — more info and tickets can be found here: https://hiddenbrain.org/tour</i></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

How to Harness Your Feelings

<p>Do you feel like you control your emotions, or do your emotions control you? What scientists call "emotion regulation" turns out to be one of the most important life skills we can possess. It's essential in dealing with setbacks, in balancing risks and rewards, and in maintaining successful relationships. This week, psychologist <a href="https://lsa.umich.edu/psych/people/faculty/ekross.html">Ethan Kross</a> explores the growing and fascinating science of managing our emotions. He explains why our feelings so often go astray, and shares insights into how to reel them back in.</p><p>In this episode, you'll learn:</p><p>*How to coach yourself through emotionally intense moments. </p><p>*Why certain types of personal writing can help with your thorniest problems or challenges. </p><p>*How to use music and your physical senses to regulate your mood. </p><p>*How to use the technique of "selective avoidance" to shortcut emotional spirals and "what if" thinking.</p><p><i>Hidden Brain is about to go on tour! Join Shankar in a city near you as we explore lessons we've learned in Hidden Brain's first decade. For more info and to purchase tickets, go to </i><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/">https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</a>. </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Relationships 2.0: Keeping Love Alive

<p>There's no magic potion that can make someone adore you. But there are things you can do to promote a deep and enduring connection — and even feelings of passion — between yourself and your partner. In the final chapter of our Relationships 2.0 series, psychologist <a href="https://www.stonybrook.edu/commcms/psychology/faculty/faculty_profiles/aaron">Arthur Aron</a> shares some techniques for falling and staying in love. </p><p>In today's conversation, we explore:</p><p>*The assumption that love fades over time.</p><p>*The effects of daily routine on romantic relationships.</p><p>*What our choice in a romantic partners says about us</p><p>*How successful long-term couples keep love alive</p><p>If you love Hidden Brain, please join us for our upcoming live tour! Shankar will be visiting cities across the U.S., and our listeners have the first crack at purchasing tickets. You can get yours at <a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/">https://hiddenbrain.org/tour/</a>. Use the pre-sale code BRAIN. We hope to see you there! </p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Relationships 2.0: Why Did You Do That? + Your Questions Answered: Fred Luskin on Grudges

<p>As we go through life, we’re constantly trying to figure out what other people are thinking and feeling. Psychologist <a href="https://www.bc.edu/bc-web/schools/mcas/departments/psychology/people/faculty-directory/liane-young.html" target="_blank">Liane Young</a> says this ability to assess other people’s thoughts ​is an extraordinary feat of cognition. This week, in a favorite episode from our archives, we explore this mental superpower — and how it can lead us astray. </p><p>In our conversation with Liane Young, we explore:</p><p>*The uniquely human ability to think about the minds of other people, which scientists refer to as "theory of mind." </p><p>*How and when young children develop this ability to intuit what's happening in other people's minds. </p><p>*Why our understanding of other people's minds affects our moral judgments — and how those judgments can be disabled.</p><p>*How misreading another person's intentions can affect our lives in both small and significant ways.</p><p>Then, in the second part of this week's show, we welcome back researcher <a href="https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/profile/fred_luskin">Fred Luskin</a>, who responds to listeners' questions about grudges. If you missed the original conversation with Fred Luskin, listen to our episode <a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/no-hard-feelings/">No Hard Feelings</a>.</p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Relationships 2.0: The Power of Tiny Interactions + Your Questions Answered: Erica Bailey on Authenticity

<p>As you go about your day, you likely interact with family, friends and coworkers. These relationships can help you feel cared for and connected. But what if there’s a whole category of people in your life whose impact is overlooked? Today, in a favorite episode from our archives, psychologist <a href="https://profiles.sussex.ac.uk/p555105-gillian-sandstrom">Gillian Sandstrom</a> reveals some simple ways to make your life a little more joyful and maybe even a little less lonely. Then, we talk with researcher <a href="https://haas.berkeley.edu/faculty/erica-r-bailey/">Erica Bailey</a>, who responds to listeners' questions about authenticity and how to reveal our true selves to the people around us.</p><p><strong>In this episode you'll learn: </strong></p><ul><li>The sociological concept of "weak" and "strong" ties, and the important roles they play in our lives.</li><li>How "weak ties" contribute to our happiness.</li><li>How to talk to strangers — including how to start, maintain, and end a conversation.</li><li>How to decrease feelings of loneliness and increase feelings of connectivity in your daily life.</li></ul><p>If you enjoyed today's conversation with Gillian Sandstrom, be sure to check out these other Hidden Brain episodes: </p><p><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-the-gift-of-other-people/">You 2.0: The Gift of Other People</a></p><p><a href="https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/mind-reading-how-others-see-you/">How Others See You</a></p><p> </p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>

Relationships 2.0: Become a Better Negotiator

<p>When we head into a negotiation — whether we're asking for a raise or trying to get our spouse to do the dishes — our focus is usually on getting the other person to agree to our preferred outcome.  What we don't focus on are our own biases and blind spots. Behavioral scientist <a href="https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Pages/profile.aspx?facId=6420">Max Bazerman</a> studies the theory and practice of negotiation, and he says that paying attention to these biases can help us to craft better deals.</p><p><a href="https://unsplash.com/illustrations/a-couple-of-men-shaking-hands-with-each-other-D5jhupsyGUA"><i>Episode art by Masantocreative for Unsplash+</i></a></p><br/> <p>Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.</p>